Wednesday

I have had a jam packed week. This has been my first week where I have worked alone here at school without my internship mentor. It has been good for me as it has thrown me into the situations that intimidate me most. I have to do what I have to do to get the job done. On the other hand it has really made me feel - lonely. Starting a new job can feel that way and since I don't have a 'supervisor' it makes it really hard to get to know people. God is doing so much through this experience. I am so thankful and I see why he wanted me here- I love my internship. I never thought that I would say that, but I do. I love this work. I have had to work on my assertiveness a lot these past couple days - something that has worn down from being out of practice since I haven't been in the field for a few years. It is frustrating, exhilarating and tiring all at the same time. Today while I was eating lunch I was thinking about how I felt when I started my first job as a foster care worker and how overwhelming it was and how long it took me to build real relationships with co-workers and to really know the ins and outs of my job. I feel that way now. I feel overwhelmed with a lot of the details but I love working with the students - LOVE IT. Sigh. Sometimes they are so great they make my insides hurt.